Memorial Service for Ovidiu Haidu, Saturday February 17th at the Unitarian Church, Notting Hill, London

Below is the order of service for the memorial service held on Saturday 17th February at the Unitarian Church, Notting Hill, London.

Welcome by Rev. Gulliford

Hymn: Praise my Soul, the King of Heaven

Reading by Verity Johnson
I Did Not Die
Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.

I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glint on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.

When you awaken in the morning’s hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.

I am the song that will never end.
I am the love of family and friend.
I am the child who has come to rest
In the arms of the Father who knows him best.

When you see the sunset fair,
I am the scented evening air.
I am the joy of a task well done.
I am the glow of the setting sun.

Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there, I do not sleep.
(Do not stand at my grave and cry.
I am not there, I did not die!)

Lighting of Candles led by Jane Stevenson

Schubert - Litenai
Sung by Brian Parsons

Readings by Alenka Ponjavic
If I should go before the rest of you,
Break no at flower nor inscribe a stone,
Nor when I'm gone speiak in a Sunday voice,
But be the usual selves that I have known.

Weep if you must,
Parting is hell,
But life goes on,
So sing as well.

(Joyce Grenfell)

Remember me when I am gone away,
Gone far away into the silent land;
When you can no more hold me by the hand,
Nor I half turn to go yet turning stay.
Remember me when no more day by day
You tell me of our furture that you planned:
Only remember me; you understand
It will be late to counsel then or pray.
Yet if you should forget me for a while
And afterwards remember, do not grieve;
For if the darkness and corruption leave
A vestige of thoughts that once I had,
Better by far you should forget and smile,
Than that you should remember and be sad.

(Christina Rossetti )

Aria: Pastorello d'un Povero Armento, from Handel's Rodelinda,
Sung by Angus McAllister

Reading by Nick Johnson
One wish alone have I:
In some calm land
Beside the sea to die;
Upon its strand
That I forever sleep,
The forest near,
A heaven near,
Stretched over the peaceful deep.
No candles shine,
Nor tomb I need, instead
Let them for me a bed
Of twigs entwine.

That no one weeps my end,
Nor for me grieves,
But let the autumn lend
Tongues to the leaves,
When brooklet ripples fall
With murmuring sound,
And moon is found
Among the pine-trees tall,
While softly rings
The wind its trembling chime
And over me the lime
Its blossom flings.

As I will then no more
A wanderer be,
Let them with fondness store
My memory.
And Lucifer the while,
Above the pine.
Good comrade mine,
Will on me gently smile;
In mournful mood,
The sea sings sad refrain ...
And I be earth again
In solitude.

(Mihai Eminescu)

Sermon by Rev Gulliford

Hymn: Now Thank we all our God

Reading by Fiona Oliver Smith
We are all here because we are friends of Ovi, because we loved Ovi - each in our own way.
Ovi, for me, was one of those people you see in a group, no a crowd, and everyone's laughing, watching him entertain, hold court, and you think, oooh! I want to know that person, I want to be his friend, I want to be in that crowd!

Well, you can just imagine, all the angels up in Heaven right now screaming with laughter, and Ovi completely taking over, and singing, his arms outstretched - and everyone clamouring to be his friend.

So, I have chosen to read a short passage from 'The Prophet' (Kahlil Gibran) on Friendship.

"Speak to us of Friendship.
And he answered, saying:
Your Friend is your needs answered.
He is your field which you sow with Love
and reap with thanksgiving.
And he is your board and your fireside
For you come to him with your hunger,
and you seek him for peace.
When your friend speaks his mind, you fear not the 'no' in your own mind,
nor do you with-hold the 'yes'.
And when he is silent your heart ceases not to listen to his heart;
For without words, in friendship, all thoughts, all desires, all expectations are born and shared.

When you part from your friend, you grieve not;
For that which you love most in him may be clearer in his absence,
as the mountain to the climber is clearer from the plain.

And in the sweetness of friendship let there be laughter, and sharing of pleasures.
For in the dew of little things the heart finds its morning and is refreshed."

Dear Ovi, who was taken from his friends, from his family, from his fans, far too early.
A friend lost but not forgotten,
He will well remain in our thoughts.
But I say, let him join us in our laughter now,
Let him still speak his mind through our mouths,
Let him sing with our hearts and with our voices,
Let him live on, through all of us!

Eulogy by Ben Bevan
Today is not the first occasion that people have gathered in this building for the sake of Ovi. Some years ago, Ovi put on a recital her to raise money for his studies in Glasgow. The letter that advertised this event to potential sponsers was written by his close friend Mark, who was always a great supoer to Ovi. After appealing for support for this highly talented tenor, the letter signed off memorably. Pease give generously so that once his famous you can say, like I, that you had a hand in Ovidiu Haidu.

Friendship and honesty were synonymous for Ovi and part of his duty as your friend was to point out where you were going off the rails, both vocally and socially. In fact, when Ovi came to stay the last time he told me off about just about everything I did. A simple shopping trip would take twice as long while he exchanged every product I had chosen for a differnet brand more to his liking. There was no malice in this though, just a desire to help out. In fact, when thingw really went wrong, for example when my wife and I lost our first baby, Ovi was there with us in Scotland. He didn't have to say anything but he was a valuable source of strength, compassionate and loving to both Juliet and me.

After his father died, Ovi's grief took a most unusual form, that of sleepwalking. Staying in his flat one night, Juliet and I were woken by the smell of burning oil. Ovi had filled a frying pan to the brim with oil, lit two gas rings, heated the oil to burning point and plunged into this 12 eggs and the egg box. Another evening, I found his sitting on a laundry basket in my wine cellar mouthing the word 'toilet' . The next morning, he would have no recollection of these events.

When Juliet and I saw Ovi last, four days before he died, he was a shadow of his former self. But it was testament to his selfless nature that the first thing he did was to ask about our children. He was great with Anna and Leo and they loved having his around.

In a world when blandness can so often be the order of the day, Ovi was a ray of light, more than that and an explosion of colour not to be ignored. Ovi may not have lived particualrly long but he really lived life to the full and enriched the life of others in so doing. It was a pleasure and an hour to call him my firiend.

Ben also read a email message from Josephine Amankwah.

From Verdi Requiem:
- Recordare, sung by Gwenneth-Ann Jeffers and Alenka Ponjavic
- Ingemisco, sung by Nick Ransley

Prayers led by Rev Gulliford

Mozart - Ave Verum
Sung by Louise Cannon, Jane Stevenson, Angus McAllister and Ben Bevan

Blessing by Rev Gulliford

Hymn: Guide me, O thou Great Redeemer

At the end of the ceremony, a recording was played of Ovidiu Haidu singing Pustaica...

The piano was played by David Pollard